1970s OUR MOTHER NAHEM & SIMON
"Dad died in 1961 mum sold the house in Stanley Road soon afterwards and bought two shops one a sweet and tobacconist shop which she ran with our help and the other shop she bought was rented out to an Opticians. Later on only Sandra worked alongside mum in the sweet shop. (The Chocolate Box).. We all lived above the property in a large flat. I was nearly 18 when dad died suddenly of a heart attack in July while I was about to start on the final year of an art course at Manchester College of Art and Design in 1960. Sandra was nearly 17 years old had also started on the course. We were both talented at art. I remember going on the bus with Dad, he to his business in Mary Street and me to the art college. After dad died Sandra never continued but I did. Sandra felt she didn't deserve to continue such was the emotion she felt but couldn’t speak about, also she had had to redo the foundationt year as she was too young to continue onto the next year.
Then in 1964 I gained a place at the Royal College of Art London an MA three year course and left for London. Mum sold the properties in 1966? and had a house built in Menorca Spain Edna who used to work in the shop for mum also had a house built there. Sandra found it unbearable living with mum as mum was permanently drunk. Mum reported Sandra to the Spanish police and had Sandrathrown off the island as she was having a sexual relationship with Dennis Barnard |
Sandra & Myrna talk about Mum and her alcohol problem
who later became her husband. Denis Barnard was originally from the UK he had grown up on the island. They divorced in the 1990s. Sandra and Denis came to live in London with Aury, Nahem and I in 1968 leaving mum on her own on the island. In 1970 Sandra, Simon, Myrna, Nahem and Aury went to visit mum and that's when those photographs were taken. Simon was just a few months old. Nahem, two years old and had just recovered from pneumonia.
By coincidence, In 1945 when I was about 2 years old I contracted pneumonia and nearly died," Myrna |
Mum in these photos is only in her 60s but looked and seemed 20 years older than that. Here she is holding Simon, Sandra's first son. Nahem, still looking ill sits next to her.
In 1979 mum died. By this time she was living with Sandra and Dennis, Simon and Danial in East Grinstead, Sussex.
In 1979 mum died. By this time she was living with Sandra and Dennis, Simon and Danial in East Grinstead, Sussex.
Mum, Simon and sad Nahem, Sandra and Myrna. Aury, Nahem's father and Myrna's husband at the time
Our mother being an alcoholic during a lot of our childhood, continued when she went to live in Spain.
In October 2007, Sandra recalled what it was like. Here is the transcript of the video.
“I couldn’t live with her it was a nightmare: I didn’t know what to do, she was unbearable, she was drinking a lot it was the same as when she used to drink when we were children but living in Spain it was a drinking culture. She could be aggressive: anything was possible. Mum was definitely an alcoholic, as she had no tolerance for alcohol. When drunk she could be anything completely unpredictable. You couldn’t reason with her she would go off at a tangent, she was completely mad,” Sandra.
In October 2007, Sandra recalled what it was like. Here is the transcript of the video.
“I couldn’t live with her it was a nightmare: I didn’t know what to do, she was unbearable, she was drinking a lot it was the same as when she used to drink when we were children but living in Spain it was a drinking culture. She could be aggressive: anything was possible. Mum was definitely an alcoholic, as she had no tolerance for alcohol. When drunk she could be anything completely unpredictable. You couldn’t reason with her she would go off at a tangent, she was completely mad,” Sandra.